Valentine’s Day Special | FFFW 225

DISCLAIMER: None of the F’s in FFFW stand for “facts.”

Welp, for the past 4 months, I’ve been talking about the Chiefs winning the Super Bowl… and let’s say that last weekend was a great reminder that I can indeed be dead wrong.

But hey, can’t win em all.

Here’s an otter to cleanse your minds of my errors.

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Funeral Director Wears Zesty Heart Tie for Valentine’s Day

WEST HAVEN, IN—A local funeral director shocked colleagues, clients, and himself this morning when he arrived at the funeral home wearing a zesty red tie adorned with small, yet tasteful, hearts. The tie, which can only be described as mildly festive, has sent ripples through the local deathcare community.

“I don’t know what came over me,” said Jason Crandall, a 27-year veteran of solemn navy and charcoal tones. “I was getting dressed, and suddenly, I thought, What if I wore something… fun? And now, I fear I may never regain control of my life.”

Reactions have ranged from genuine delight to mild discomfort. Embalmer Susan Wrigley admitted she had to take a moment to compose herself upon seeing Jason’s festive neckwear.

“I thought maybe he had finally snapped,” Wrigley said. “I mean, we’re talking about a guy who considers wearing gray slacks ‘a little wild.’ And now this? It’s like seeing a nun with a nose ring.”

The disruption extended to the funeral home’s service schedule, as several families in attendance at morning visitations were overheard whispering about the “bright red distraction” at the front of the chapel. One mourner mistook the tie for a marketing promotion, asking if the funeral home was running a Valentine’s Day discount on cremations.

Despite the commotion, Jason remains committed to finishing out the day in his audacious accessory. “I can’t turn back now,” he said, adjusting his tie with the careful precision of a man questioning everything. “But mark my words—tomorrow, it’s back to navy.”

At press time, sources confirmed Jason was seen staring at himself in the mirror, muttering, “What have I done?” while clutching a black tie in one hand and a bottle of Maalox in the other.

You Otter Be Proud

Here’s some good news going on in the profession.

1. Wilson Funeral Home director honored for organ donor support
2. Old Lick Cemetery in Roanoke cleaned, repaired with help of national expert
3. Fifth-generation funeral director Jeff Monreal helps families grieve, celebrate loved ones

As Valentine’s Day rolls around this year, Chelsea and I want to say, “Thank you” and “We Care” to all of you on our staff who are close to us in our hearts. In a day and time when we’ve all been “beyond busy” in our professional lives, in-house there’s a group of people who deserve extra recognition and this is the appropriate time to do it.

Fortunately, holidays force us to take the time to think about who we want to lift up and say “Thank you” to for all the ways in which our team members encourage our local heroes for being all they can be. Our police, fire, and emergency services personnel daily save our lives, and have our heartfelt regards for doing so. That they are “there” to help, assist, and protect us from harm means so much.

Valentine’s Day doesn’t just mean a chocolate-coated card and some treats (although there’s nothing wrong with chocolate!). It’s a time to say thank-you to the angels (Chelsea suggested “Cody’s Angels”) working in both of our locations to serve our families. These full-time angels include Patti Wade, Receptionist & Family Service Professional, Jean Scott, Office Manager, Amber Mastrobattista, Graphic Designer, Charlene Rathjen, Accounting, and Jessica Starr, Advance Planning Specialist. Of course, we have other part-time angels.

Now, in our home, as Rowen, Bowtie Bogey, and I would all agree, Chelsea is our favorite angel, who makes every day so special for the Jones family. Days pass by so quickly right now, it’s rare to get a few minutes to plan ahead for celebrating.

Did you know that over 180 Million Valentine’s Day cards are exchanged every year? Web site

notes that of those, 85% of those cards are purchased by women while men buy 73% of all flowers! What will you be doing for your Valentines this year?  From our home to yours, Happy Valentines Day!

Cody D. Jones ’02 and Chelsea Jones ‘11

Owners & Community Members

For some of us, this is the first Valentine’s Day without someone special in our lives, as a death has occurred since the last time we celebrated the occasion. For spouses, for children who’ve lost a grandparent, for parents who’ve lost a child too soon, or a dear friend losing another longtime friend—nothing reminds you of loss more than the Valentine Day holiday rolling around.

The TV commercials around this time are relentless and so, too, is likely the pain with which those who have lost their Valentines must feel to be reminded of this fact. And yet, the day is about love. So, how do you get through it on a day when your heart is breaking? I’m not sure I have “the” answer, but one or two thoughts come to mind that have been shared with me by those who have walked this path before.

In the days before Valentine’s Day, chances are good that you’ve revisited a collection of cards and/or photos where the two of you were together in years past. Your mind flashes back to a day and time during the happiest times of your life.

It’s okay to review those cards, messages, and notes, but if it hurts too much right now, don’t feel under any obligation to walk those steps until you are fully ready. Is there a way you can approach and proceed through Valentine’s Day in a way that helps to heal?

For every loss in life we have a length of relationship that has extended for a long period of time—at those times, life seemed perfect, it seemed like it couldn’t be any better, and one way to look at it is to celebrate that you did indeed find in this life a truly beloved partner, someone who made you know that you were truly loved. Some people go through life and don’t find that person. That you had that love is worth celebrating, not just at Valentine’s Day but on any occasion.

One way to take the focus off our own hearts is to think of the hearts of others who are alone on this holiday. If your children or grandchildren are also missing their loved one, you might take time to send them cards, or candy, or take them out to dinner. Share time together with all those who miss your loved one. Reminisce, reflect, and honor their memory with an active celebration of a “day of love” for your loved one.

Did you lose your Valentine this past year? Are one or more of your parents still alive? You can always reach out to them and include them in your memories, and it would likely be very much appreciated. Helping everyone who has sustained the loss you also sustained is a positive movement forward in processing your own loss.

If you lost a child this year, it could be healing to gather your closest relatives and meet for a Valentine’s Dinner or Brunch. It’s not a time to be alone, so see if there’s an opportunity to come together and not isolate yourself at this precious holiday.

If you have a neighbor who is especially important to your heart and they live alone, it’s a perfect day to surprise them with a card, a call, or some flowers, especially when their family may or may be local here, and your thoughtfulness will send them a smile that will last long beyond the special day of love.

Most of all no matter what day of the year it is…never miss a good chance to tell people you love that you love them. Don’t rush out of this life in such a hurry that you miss sharing love with others in your life who keep you first in their hearts. You don’t want to leave words unsaid, hugs not shared, or people isolated by sorrow. Reach out your arms open wide and look for someone whose heart seems to have an open space to welcome your sharing part of your heart. Together, you can overcome hurt and as you heal together, celebrating the love of Valentine’s Days—past, present, and future.

Share your love and show your love to those you love every day. Valentine’s is one day; loving people and loving life is for a lifetime. Happy Valentine’s Day to all!

Cody D. Jones ’02

Owner & Community Member

Today is Valentine’s Day and for all who celebrate it is a day to say those three magic words which everyone of all ages loves to hear: “I love you!”

This one phrase is considered the best message to give and receive to anyone who truly loves another person unselfishly, unconditionally, and irrevocably. A child says it to a parent, and a parent says it to a child. A teenager in the budding phases of young love says it, often for the first time, with a new intonation to someone to whom they wish to give their hearts.

For as many times as we love to hear this phrase, each of us has our own special way of not only ‘saying’ our love to another person, but showing it as well. Many women find it easy to express their emotions in their various life stages. But for many men, it all depends on what they grew up hearing. If you hear it often, chances are good, you learn to say it frequently.

What did your grandfather say to your grandmother? Did you hear the words “My beloved,” or “My sweetheart,” or “My bride” even after your grandparents had been married over 50 years? Many couples who share a lifetime of love indeed address each other that way. Others have special names for each other that “mean” love rather than specifically reflect it. Still others can say “I love you” with just the change in their voices when they call out the names of the other one. You’d know it when you hear it.

Other men, though, have a unique way of saying it that does not involve those three words. I remember from reruns that TV’s Archie Bunker was legendary for never saying it back to Edith, whenever she said “Oh, I love you, Archie!” He’d say “Yeah,” and hug her back. One day when his son in law, Mike, complained, “Archie, you never tell Ma you love her!” He replied, “I said it to her once, Meathead, and that was the day we got married, and I meant it.” Eventually, Archie found his way to saying it (again) to Edith that day, and of course, that meant the world to her. In fact, the less we hear it, the more it seems we want to hear it.

Couples who have been together a long time can share their love and affection without words. The other evening there was a rerun of the Jeff Bridges and Barbra Streisand movie, “The Mirror Has Two Faces,” and Barbra Streisand realizes that Jeff is in love with her when he asks the waiter to bring her an extra salad dressing and to please keep both of them on the side. It’s the little things that people in love know and appreciate about their partners that prove their genuine affection without having to say “those other words.”

When we are children, we are more than happy to proclaim our love for people, for our favorite foods, our favorite TV shows, anything that bring us special peace and happiness in our lives. We use the word “love” to show our special attachment to something. For everything else, we have “like” or “don’t care” or in extreme cases, “don’t like” or “can’t stand.” That’s a general rating scale we begin with. To go to greater depth than those basic levels requires age and more experience.

The longer we live, the more we come to cherish the full nature of the people we love in our lives. We seek out people who are kind, fun, intelligent, happy, good listeners, faithful friends, hard workers, people who set high goals, people who are happy to belong to families and play an important role in that family.

In life, it is frequently said that “Opposites attract,” and to a certain extent, that’s true. People who are strong in one area tend to find confidence in people who are strong in another, and those who may be weaker in one thing can take confidence in another person who is strong in that area. Together they are an unbeatable pair.

I remember from science, “like attracts like.” That phrase usually applies in solution chemistry where similar components can dissolve in others that are alike enough to them to dissolve in. That’s where the phrase “likes dissolve likes” comes from, and if they are not soluble, then you see one separate phase of a liquid sitting on top of a phase of another liquid because they don’t dissolve into the other because they are not alike (nonpolar) (oil and water). So, it is in romance. On one hand you might a man who loves to talk is attracted to a quiet woman, or vice versa. In business, one person can be the one who deals with people and the other deals with numbers. Together you’re unbeatable!

Over years, romance strengthens and the words “I love you” are implied no matter how many times they are said out loud. Still, Valentine’s Day is a great opportunity to remember how nice it is to hear and how important to say them to all those whom we love.

You can say it with candy, with hearts, with flowers, and with great greeting cards. You can phone, Skype, Zoom, and FaceTime to get your message transmitted. Be sure that you say it often, whether or not it is Valentine’s Day, but this annual event is certainly a great reminder of a wonderful tradition.

Happy Valentine’s Day to all of you from our family to you!

Cody D. Jones ‘02

Owner & Community Member